Midweek Funny

We have come accustomed to traveling on Christmas Day. Typically, there are fewer crowds, we can enjoy Santa at home and we still have the chance to spend time with family on this special day. This year, we headed out at about 3:30 p.m. set to arrive in San Jose at around 5:30 p.m. Our flight was fabulous; free drinks, quiet time for reading while Eva engaged in her DVDs. At the airport, our bags came within 15 minutes and skies were clear as we headed outside to catch the rental car shuttle. We re-affirmed our belief in Christmas Day travel.

We pulled into the rental car complex and headed straight for the car. Tony takes pride in his preferred membership which allows the simple luxury of bypassing the rental booth. We were feeling a special elation in the fact that we were getting a free weekend due to his past travel trends. With anticipation, we approached our row. What would it be this time. A Pontiac LeBaron, Hyundai Sonata, Ford something another (I know nothing about cars).... As our footsteps sped closer and it came into view, it was as if someone hit the slow motion button. Our strides become longer and the pace slowed to that of a turtle until Tony halted in an abrupt stop. A Crown Victoria, the ultimate in cruisers stood before us. "I am not taking that car", he stated. "What's wrong with it. It looks roomy and comfortable", I declared. I can't remember exactly how he responded. I'd like to say it was something like "It is a gas guzzler and I am not driving it," but since we own a Navigator purchased when we thought we would have two children and visiting grandparents to haul around, I doubt that was his response. To this day, I am not certain exactly why the Vic was rejected but rejected it was as he made his way in the dark to the rental booth. Eva and I hastily took cover in the car until he returned.

Now, for those of you who have never been to the rental car complex in San Jose, allow me to paint you the picture. First of all, it houses several car agencies so there are MANY car slots. Second, typically the lot is empty, except in economic slumps during which the high techs have cut travel allowances. Third, it is operated by gentlemen that I believe are of the Sikh religion and do not appear to be originally from an English-speaking country. I point out this fact only as it relates to the gentlemen running the car agency and their varying degree of competency with the English language (which will become important later :). They are always very kind but you aren't always certain they are grasping what you are saying.

After about ten minutes sitting in the deserted lot surrounded by what seemed thousands of empty cars, Tony comes trudging out not looking like a satisfied customer. "You aren't going to believe this. The only other car they have is a such and such." Well, at that I had to laugh. "You've got to be kidding me. There are like a thousand cars here. How is he justifying that," I bellowed. "He says they are all dirty." At this, I just started laughing. To me, it was comical. To Tony, it was not. He believes in loyalty and the perks that result and consequently, feels that only having two choices of cars in a lot of thousands is totally unacceptable. I saw his point but sitting in the dark, cold lot with a 4 year old was enough for me and I wanted to get the heck out of dodge. "Well, I took down his name and number. I have had it with this car agency," he declared.

We uttered not a word as we loaded our luggage into the new car and got settled. I for one thought the Vic may have been more comfortable but honestly I didn't really care. Tony continued to grumble about the experience and was not finished with his tirade as we approached the check out booth. Clearly, he was going to re-state his dissatisfaction and try to get the respect that a loyalty member perceived that he was owed.

The gentleman in the booth quickly took the paperwork to review the required information. Tony immediately begins his speech about loyalty membership and how "this is the worst experience I have ever had with a car rental agency." And, "how is that you don't provide greater customer service." And, "can you believe that I am being treated this way?" Clearly, Tony was looking for some acknowledgment and confirmation of our plight and how we of course were in the right as we were customers.

After about 30 seconds to a minute of one-sided dialogue with little to no movement by the gentleman in the booth, Tony looked at him and asked, "Have you heard a word that I have said?" At that, the gentleman turned to us and said, "Would you like the gas option?". For about 2 seconds, you could hear a pin drop; until I started roaring. Well, Tony is actually a pretty laid back guy and the roar became infectious. He himself quickly donned his most adoring smile, grabbed the paperwork back through the window and screeched out of the lot laughter filling the night. We are still laughing about it to this day.

Moral of the story:

"Don't take life too seriously; you'll never get out of it alive."
-- Elbert Hubbard